Nurture Shock: New Thinking About Children Revised

What to do About Lying

  • Drinking, drug use, and sex are hid the most. The main reasons teens say they lie is to stay out of trouble. They also don’t want to disappoint their parents. Many parents believe the best way to get teens to disclose is to be more permissive and not set rules. Permissive parents don’t learn more. The kids take the lack of rules as a sign their parents don’t care.
  • The type of parents who are actually most consistent in enforcing rules are the same parents who are most warm and have the most conversations with their kids. Rather than just badgering kids with the message “Don’t Do Drugs,” wouldn’t it be more effective to teach them how else to really enjoy their free time. You need to teach your kids how not to be bored.
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